Prayer Requests

I know that a lot of people who check my blogs have very strong faith, so I'm hoping that you'll all join together in praying for a couple of things that are on my heart.
First of all, my mom has been battling cancer for a while now. She's truly the strongest (physically and emotionally) person that I've ever met in my life. And I'm not biased...she just has really been strong through a lot of tough circumstances. Mom started radiation last week, and although her spirits remain good, physically she is not feeling great. Please pray for her body to handle the radiation better, and for her spirits to remain high. She's had a good attitude and great faith through everything that she's gone through, but I know that having prayer warriors in her corner will always help.
Secondly, I know it might sound silly to anyone who is not an animal lover, but in my family, our pets are our kids. So, I was really sad to hear today that my Aunt Beverly's dog Mindy is sick. Beverly and my Uncle Bub were supposed to come and visit from Houston this weekend, but they're postponing so that they can make sure that everything is okay with Mindy. Please pray that Mindy will begin to feel better and that Beverly and Bub will have peace of mind that their sweet dog will be okay.
Thanks to all for every prayer that's been said on the behalf of myself and my family over these last several months.

Turn the Page

The last several months of my life have been so hard. My mom (who is my world!) has been dealing with cancer...going through chemo and now radiation, my job was not good, my health has been less than great, and, of course, my baby boy didn't survive. It's been heartache after heartache, and I'm so ready for some good times. Hopefully, this week is the beginning of a new, happier chapter in my life.
Today, I started my new job. It's really nice to be back in the hospital. So many people have seemed excited to see me, and very happy to have me back. I went to several clinics today, and the doctors that I saw all seemed ecstatic that I was taking on this new role, and that I would be available to help them through any issues that they have.
Physically, I'm feeling a lot better. Emotionally, I have my good moments and my bad moments. But the bad moments are fewer and further between now. I still can't think of Jude without fighting tears, but sometimes I win the battle and don't cry.
Hopefully the new job will bring a new perspective on the sadness of the past several months. I pray that it will.

One Month

So today is officially one month since my little guy was born and died. In ways, it feels like it was just yesterday, but in others, it feels like this month has dragged by. I wonder how long it will be before the 2nd of a month goes by without me thinking, "Jude would have been x months old today"? I don't want to forget about it, but I hope that the next one doesn't hurt as much as today has. Today has been horrible...tears for no reason, easily angered, feelings hurt easily...just pretty much a miserable day.
The good news is that I went to the doctor today, and he said I'm healing well. He told me I can start going to the gym, which I'm really happy about. I've had a membership at the new gym in Lowell since before it opened in November, but haven't used it because I've been so sick. I'm actually looking forward to getting in the pool and swimming some laps. And, once my ab muscles feel a little better, I want to go back to pilates classes. So, I guess it's good that I'm looking forward to something.
The doctor also said I could go back to work. I'm going to be off next week, and then I'll go a week from Monday. Next week, BJ and I are going to Branson for a few nights...just the two of us. We've NEVER gone away alone together...we even took the kids on our honeymoon. I'm terrified of being away from Savanna for more than 24 hours, but I'm looking forward to some time with no kids and no obligations for us to have together. We can't afford to do much while we're there, but the trip itself isn't costing much. I went on one of those timeshare tour thingies that gave me 3 nights in a hotel, a $30 gift certificate for dinner, and 2 show tickets, so that's some entertainment for no money. BJ's never been to an IMAX, so I think we're going to try and do that while we're there, too. I think it will be good to have some time just us.
So, I've actually got a few things I'm looking forward to. I guess that's a step in the right direction.